Fears of a first solo adventure
I have decided to take a leap of faith in 2017 by taking two months off work to travel and tick some of the many things off my bucket list. For the last year I have had this strong desire to go on an adventure; one where I will be thrown into the deep-end and forced to grow. I have been staring at the quote on my wall for too long. It is time now to go and live it.
Once I made up my mind to go on this adventure my initial reaction was excitement, but now as I am planning my itinerary and making different bookings I am starting to feel anxious and unsure. Luckily, most of my plane tickets have been booked so there is no turning back now, however I still have a lot of questions and fears.
1) What if I don’t like it
I have always been ok with being alone. I do not have a problem sitting by myself in a restaurant or doing my own thing, however having been on these adventures with friends in the past I am very aware of the fact that everything might not be as fun. I have always been spontaneous between friends, but I find it hard to just strike up a conversation with random people.
2) What if I get lost
From what I read online this will almost certainly happen and it will be ok as it is part of the adventure. I tend to be very plan-orientated, I plan most of my life and get uneasy when things go in a different direction. Knowing that I have no real control over the situation scares and excites me at the same time.
3) Sharing a room with strangers sounds awful
If you’re a private person like me, you do not like sharing your space with random strangers. I have decided to only stay in hostels as this will surely be out of my comfort zone and hopefully will help me meet some great people along the way. The fear of people stealing my things, loud snores and weird smells are definitely not getting me excited.
4) Am I dreaming too big
I have this expectation of what I think the adventure is going to be like and how it will change me. My fear is that I am expecting too much; what if I come back and still feel a desire to go and do something, what if I don’t change at all, what if I just wasted a lot of money. What if, what if, what if…
Fact is, I realise that all these question are just fear trying to take a great experience away from me. Maybe some of my fears will be proven to have been correct, maybe some of my fears won’t but I have come to the conclusion that ‘not knowing’ will be worse.
Note: I will be sharing my journey on my Instagram profile and Youtube channel.